Blogged 3 in a row

Hurting words do really have some effect on me. I really broke down. Now, I don’t mean to be a attention seeker. I was not expecting much from you, just normal friends. So hard to come true, I ask myself why I care when you even don’t. Actually, I know you are not friends with me because of any reasons, I think? I know I can count on you, maybe? Until now I know I still can although I hear about this and that, but I don’t think we can even talk properly again. Esther is being a bitch this few months, I agree. I know that myself. XJ, YT are friends who come and go. Remember what I told you? Next time when we are twenty plus will we still be friends? Then I had some doubts and said, maybe by then, we are already not friends and you said I was being stupid, thinking too far. Maybe I was right and maybe you were wrong, I knew this was going to happen eventually, one day. I guess you have forgotten all this. Esther give nothing but troubles, Esther never learns from her mistakes, Esther always take things for granted, Esther talks without using her brains, Esther sometimes leaves her friends for better people, Esther gets jealous easily, jealous! Esther is a failure, Esther wouldn’t be able to help you when you needed help, and Esther disappoints you. But sometimes, maybe I shouldn’t have even treasure friendships easily. Because friends wouldn’t be there for you forever. Sometimes I think about the past, I get too upset, far too easily. It’s true that actually, the people who seem to be the happiest are the most troubled people. Everyone’s hiding it. I don’t know what’s wrong with you sometimes, what’s eating you up. So sorry I have betrayed your trust and your secrets. Sorry is used too often; I don’t even think its projects out to you as I really mean it. Don’t be angry but sometimes I feel that I sometimes say sorry when it isn’t my fault. Why? I feel very insecure I will lose my friend(s) because I have experienced this too many times. Thank you for the good memories anyway. Eat, sleep, talk, walk, shit well. Take care; don’t tell my sister I ask you to take care okay? Later she say me. Sometimes I just don’t understand why you are like that. Face to face.

pictures a few months ago, i still got swiming pictures.

sigh :(